In my experience of living this lifetime, I may have undergone a million experiences as moments were faced with fear, anxiety, helplessness, dejection, disillusionment, despondency, and others that have deeply affected me then, and have also stirred something inside me.
Interestingly enough, some of my very intense moments of fear and helplessness mostly pressed a button somewhere inside me, that separated an essential part of me distinctly different from the ‘me’ that was involved and immersed into that momentary explosion of grief, and self-pity. These rare moments had a mysterious potential for me – an opportunity for lifting open an unknown eye that could ‘see’ through the shallow nature of a transitory experience – and more importantly witness this human mechanism undergoing a severe contraction, here and now. The immediate experience was like a space opening up inside that lit up the truth of life coursing through a passage, transiting in this human form. There, in that very enlightening space, I could see, for my being, a larger reality than just the day-to-day story of my human experience in relation to a limited world of my perception. Momentarily, when that eye opened, I could see that that enlightening space was the essence of my being, and that in that intense grief-stricken moment, I was able to feel the true lightness of my being, totally in contrast with the extreme contraction of my body and mind.
In this sudden lifting up of the spirit into a clarity of immensity, and beyond the human façade there is a realization for me – that my embodied human form is a small miniscule little significant part of a larger mechanism or a field, beyond my thinking ability, where the world of thought – name – form - substance is all intricately inter-connected and moving simultaneously, as if drawn ahead by a single thread of energetic force. And that the ability within my being to momentarily step up and out of the unfolding human story, to witness the spectacle of ‘Prakriti’ suffused by ‘Prana’ – of interacting elements thrown in a hyperactive field; this witnessing happens truly in the space of unchanging absolute Consciousness, which is the essence of my existence.
The more I have consciously taken notice of this play of two sides of Consciousness within me, and learnt to stay in the uplifted space of witnessing stillness, the lesser has been my pre-occupation with the unfolding story of this embodied human form, which I have been able to ‘let go’ – And this has brightened another aspect of my being – I can feel the same light space of unchanging stillness to be the pure essence of everything around me, giving rise to a sparkling compassion for every thought – name – form - substance in the perceptive field. This is a truly miraculous feeling – to know and recognize everything around to be having the same essence… same essential core that is different and diverse only in its outer form.
The threshold of happiness… the ‘lightness of being’ within me is stretching out and connecting with everything in my field of perception and feeling euphoric in its Oneness of essence. The people that I work with and meet often, the children in my school, my cats and their kitten, the shabby dog that strays into my garden and looks at me with deep acceptance, the people that put hurdles in my path, the factory buildings in the vicinity that have deprived me of my view of the mountain – all are just thought forms emerging out of a still deep unmoving unchanging space of compassion. My acceptance of this absolute truth brushes away all sense of instability and insecurity that used to bother me earlier in my life. I am able to freely give and turn my handsome reward to another person without feeling the remorse of loss. I am able to experience abundant happiness as I see little faces break out into glowing smiles. My realization of a space of stillness within enables simplicity to take over my human life, away from the pretensions and compulsions of ego-centeredness.
We stumble upon these human possibilities of privileges unknowingly or with unbending intention, I have no clue – but surely our ancestors left behind a legacy of spiritual wisdom for us to attain ‘Mukti’ only by walking on the path of complete acceptance & surrender – here is the beautiful mantra from the Hindu scriptures, I heard all through my childhood but came to understand in its full value, only much later…
“Kayena vaachaa manas endriya vaa…Budhi atmana vaa prakriti svabhavaa
Karoni yadyam sakalam parasmai …Narayanaa yeti samarpayami”
All that I am as a manifestation of being…
my feeling, words, mind and senses
my intelligence, soul and nature,
I offer all of these, as a whole
To the Lord of the Universe, Narayana!!
As most of us are aware that where you put your unwavering focused attention is where you can alter the energies… I would love to put my best attention to these ‘lightness of life’ concepts in every moment of my existence…
Can I refine my perception by realizing the truth of this manifested reality!
Can I feel the universal energy shining through every living form!